Outing the Metrosexual

Is the Metrosexual the modern man?

Commonly defined as “a straight, sensitive, well-educated, urban dweller who is in touch with his feminine side, has a standing appointment for a weekly manicure, and most likely has his hair cared for by a stylist rather than a barber, frequents the gym and is very fashion conscious” the Metrosexual has emerged as one of modern marketing’s newest demographic.

The term “metrosexual”, while tracing its roots as far back as the early 80’s, really caught on sometime 2002-2003; inspiring shows like “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” and elevating spas to "lechon-manok" ubiquity.

While I agree that the modern man has definitely evolved from the rugged and macho Marlboro Man, I still don’t buy the idea that what has emerged as the man of the new millennium is the “metrosexual” as defined above.

For me, “metrosexual” is more accurately the new “bisexual”. In other words, it more accurately defines the I’m-gay-but-I’m-not-ready-to-come-yet gender. The word itself seems more similarly coined to words that describe sexual preferences (e.g. heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual and transsexual).



This is why I think a lot of modern (straight) men who are called a “metrosexual” cringe and are even quick to deny that they are part of this demographic. Sure, the new breed of men are a little more conscious of how they look and are more refined, but there are just too many dodgy characteristics of the metrosexual that makes us, who are referred to as one, feel more uncomfortable, even insulted, than flattered. So, for the record, the modern man is not the likes of Ryan Seacrest.

The modern man is not fashionable. He is stylish. He is not interested in couture. He has a tailor. He takes extra effort to look good and be well groomed because he is discriminating and demands no less from his girl. He knows what clothes are right for him and how to be the perfect accessory to his date. Think Leonardo DiCaprio and Ashton Kutcher.


The modern man does not wear any form of make-up but recognizes that, as women continue to work on delaying aging, they will want a mate that does not look like a prune. So, he takes care of his skin. Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt, Keanu Reeves and Johnny Depp have all made 40 the new 30.

The modern man does not carry a man bag. The concept of a “man bag” is as ridiculous as lady condoms. It’s simply naïve to think that a man bag-totting guy won’t try to take a quick peek to check you out if you happen to be side-by-side in a public toilet.

The modern man shouldn’t need a manicure or a pedicure. For one, there’s really just one way to wear our nails – short. How hard can it be to cut your own nails? And what could move anyone to color their nails? There’s nothing modern about pink, freshly manicured or pedicured nails. In fact, they’re often seen on men that are dirty and old.

The modern man does not wear jewelry, but knows enough about them to buy only the best for his girl. Birthdays, your engagement, anniversaries, Christmas and please-forgive-me moments are just among the many occasions where you will find that this skill is just as important as studying her menstrual cycle.

The modern man does not spend an inordinate amount of time in the gym. Why? Well, because that’s not where all the hot girls are. However, he is conscious enough to get the right amount of exercise and watches what he eats because he knows that women want a man who can live to see their children grow up.

There is a new breed of men now being called “ubermen”. Ubermen are defined as a heterosexual man who is masculine, confident, compassionate, and stylish. The marketing community has realized that Ricky Martin is just not in the same league as Bono, George Clooney or our very own Jaime Augusto Zobel de Ayala.

So is the uberman the modern man? Maybe, but all I know is he most probably lives in the valley between Marlboro Country and Brokeback Mountain.

What to Acquire & What to Retire

Acquire: Slim, pointed leather dress shoes. Whether cap-toe or wing tip, slim shoes complete the trim, contemporary cuts of you shirt and pants.



Retire: Square-toed dress shoes. The paddle foot look is (thankfully) over.



Acquire: Money clip – A good way of helping you bring only the cash you really need and making sure your pants don’t lose their form.

Retire: Thick, bulky wallets - Apart from causing butt shiners on your pants, they’re not good for the lower back if you habitually place them in your back pocket.


Acquire: Checkered and pencil-striped polo shirts – 2008 celebrates European style. Checks and pencil-stripes are in the boardrooms of Milan, London and Paris.

Retire: Diagonal-striped polo shirts – They never really looked good anyway.



Acquire: Low-waist straight cut jeans – Jeans are supposed to be comfortable and to allow you to move more freely. This cut also never goes out of style.

Retire: Skinny jeans – There can only be one Gino Padilla. Plus, you can’t wear them with boxers.



Acquire: Tailored, flat front pants – The overall objective is to look trim. And, since we come in all shapes and sizes, your tailor will give your pants the nips and tucks it needs.

Retire: Loose, pleated pants – Do you really need me to explain? Okay, one word – Daddy.




Acquire: Sneakers & Loafers – The right way to be (or look) sockless. In case you haven’t noticed yet, yes, preppy is back.
Retire: Flip-flops – A good percentage of male feet look just plain nasty! This was a painful realization after 2006 started the pambahay look. Thankfully, people are coming back to their senses.



Acquire: A leather briefcase – This is the only acceptable “man bag” as far as I’m concerned. This fits your work stuff and basic toiletry kit (see November’s issue for what this should minimally contain).

Retire: Clutch bags – Three letters – D.O.M. Okay, so you have a gun, but honestly, do you really think you can open your precious clutch bag and get your gun out in time when you’re under attack?



Acquire: A kick-ass dress watch – When choosing a dress watch look for elegance and style; not too flashy and sparkly. I know big, chunky watches are what’s happening right now, but since this will be an investment, choose something more classic and timeless (no pun there).

Retire: All other jewelry – Unless you’re a hip hop singer/rapper, then maybe. Remember, all that glitters is for your girlfriend.



Acquire: A leather planner – I don’t know about you, but the conventional planner still works best for me in organizing my schedule and for taking notes in meetings. Plus, you can’t stuff business cards and receipts in your PDA, can you?

Retire: PDAs – How many guys who have PDAs actually use them as planners? Most PDAs end up as glorified calculators. To those that do use them as organizers, then good for you. But to the majority that don’t, trade your PDA for a slim cellphone that can do e-mail and has a decent camera and you’re pretty much set.

Acquire: A Facebook Account – Developed by Harvard Alumni, this relatively new social networking site is loads better than its predecessors. Aside from a better layout, it has cool applications that can get addicting. The other nice thing about Facebook is that every update is relatively transparent to everyone, so there’s not a lot of crap going around.

Retire: Your Friendster Account – Friendster is what ICQ was for instant messaging. Leave this to the kids.

Rubber Suit

Q: “I see a lot of magazines showing guys wearing sneakers with their suits. Is this acceptable?”
-- Richard, Pasay City


A: If you’re commuting to work in, say, New York City, then maybe you could pull this off without getting a lot of stares. Even then, you would have to change your shoes when you get to your workplace. But, if you’re in Manila, you will likely be wearing a suit because the occasion calls for something more dressy or business-appropriate. So, no, this is not acceptable. Stick to what we know works – a nice pair of Italian leather shoes.

Justin Timberlake can get away with it, yes, but this is the guy that dumped Cameron Diaz, he can’t always be right…

Who Pays?

Q: “I’m getting married this year and would like to know if there is a rule about footing the bill for my entire male entourage’s outfit.”
- Patrick, San Juan

A: No real rule for this. It all boils down to your budget. Ideally, so you can have control over what your entourage uniformly wears and how you can set yourself apart from them, you pay for everything. In which case, the more economical but still elegant option is to go with barongs. Now, if Daddy ain’t helping with the bill, just provide the fabric and have them pay for the labor cost. It would be good to insist for them to all go to your tailor, though, so you still maintain control over the styles; ensuring that your suit or barong stands out vis-à-vis your entourage’s.

Comfortably Flat

“I finally had my first flat front pants made. While they do look nicer, they’re not as comfortable as my pleated pants. Should I just accept this or was there something wrong with the way it was made?”
- Carlos, Alabang



A: I bet you sucked-in your stomach when you were being measured by your tailor, tsk, tsk… While flat front pants are not as roomy as pleated pants, they should not be uncomfortable. The thing with flat front pants is that the measurements need to be exact. There is very little room to accommodate unwanted and unexpected bulges; whether from gaining weight or as a result of arousal. So what you want to do is go back to your tailor to get yourself re-measured. This time wear boxer shorts and make sure that your shirt is tucked in while you are being measured. This will ensure your tailor captures the additional layers that can contribute to the snug fit of your pants. It’s also best to go after a full meal so he can consider the allowance he needs for when you have a full stomach.

Wrinkle-free Barong

Q: “Do you have any tips for how not to wrinkle the back of my barong when I sit? It just looks awful when I walk around and the back is wrinkled and bunched up after sitting for a long time. ”
- Gerry, Manila

A: Finally! I thought I was the only one bothered by this. Yes, as a matter of fact, I have what seems to be a working solution to this problem. And, believe it or not, the idea came from what women have been doing for a long time. You know how women slide their hands on the backside of their skirts before sitting down? That’s to make sure their skirts down wrinkle and bunch up while sitting; retaining their shape when they stand. If you do the same thing with the backside of your barong before you sit you will find out that it works just as well. So now, you can even wear your barong when you drive! Next, we deal with how to prevent wrinkling your shirt from wearing a seatbelt.

Bloody Red

No, this is not a paid post by Clear Dandruff Shampoo. It's just me venting on why everythning must be bloody red on Feb. 14.

1. Please, please, please fight the urge to wear red today. I mean, give the color a rest already; we already saw a lot of red last February 7, Chinese New Year.

2. Roses come in many different colors. Peach is probably the most romantic of them.

3. Stay away from restaurants decorated with red cut outs of hearts and boy-and-girl-leaning-forward-in-a-kissing-action. They will likely not have wine.

Men - I hope you made reservations. No decent restaurant will have an empty table for walk-ins.

Ladies - Be nice to your men. They skipped a lot of lunches to make this day a little special.